Showing posts with label Cabbage Patch Kids. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Cabbage Patch Kids. Show all posts

Saturday, June 28, 2025

A Childhood Obsession with Garbage Pail Kids! (And Why I Never Had Them)


Hey there, fellow nostalgics! Today, I’m taking a little detour from the usual grind. My book, Under the Lifeguard's Watch, is still calling my name and Casper and Soren are really pushing me to get their story just right. And while Saturdays are typically reserved for my beloved Saturday TV memories (hello, Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling!), I've got so much on my plate right now that a GLOW post will have to wait for another day. Saturday GLOWcase will be back, I promise!

But today, I just had to talk about something that was a massive part of my childhood wants, a true relic of the 80s that drove some parents absolutely bonkers and kept teachers on a constant hunt for contraband: Garbage Pail Kids. Now, before you start picturing my own childhood collection, let me clarify: I never actually got Garbage Pail Kids as a kid. I knew better than to even ask Mama. Daddy's reaction was a dismissive wave and a pronouncement that they were "stupid" and that baseball cards were a far superior investment. He even started a collection for me, which I mostly ignored, more interested in the cute players than the stats. Daddy eventually took them away from me and continued collecting cards throughout the years. I think Becki still has Daddy's card collection. As for Garbage Pail Kids, much like every other kid showing theirs off, they likely would have been confiscated by my teachers anyway. So, while I didn't own them, their legend definitely loomed large in my late elementary school years.

Do you remember those wonderfully disgusting trading cards and stickers? Man, they were everything to a 10 year old! Released by Topps back in 1985, these bad boys were a hilarious and utterly gross parody of the incredibly popular Cabbage Patch Kids. While Cabbage Patch dolls were all about sweetness and adoption, GPKs were their ugly, booger-picking, eyeball-popping counterparts. And we absolutely loved them!

The creative minds behind these masterpieces were Mark Newgarden and the legendary Pulitzer Prize-winning cartoonist Art Spiegelman, among others. The main creative artist, John Pound, truly brought these characters to life with his perfectly grotesque illustrations, and he had a fantastic team helping him out, including talents like Tom Bunk, James Warhola and Jay Lynch.

They were all the rage, and it felt like every kid in the cafeteria and on the playground was trading them and showing off their latest finds. But, as you can imagine, something so delightfully rebellious wasn’t going to fly everywhere. Schools all over started banning them left and right. I remember the constant threat of confiscation; it was like a secret mission just to bring them to school! And then, of course, the inevitable happened: the creator of the Cabbage Patch dolls slapped Topps with a lawsuit. It was a whole big thing, but it honestly just made them even cooler to us kids.

From the iconic Adam Bomb, whose head literally explodes, to the delightfully morbid Ghastly Ashley, there were over 600 cards released across 16 different series. And get this – they were produced in tons of countries, so kids all over the world got to revel in their gross-out glory. What was really neat was that most cards came in two versions, "a" and "b," with the only difference being the name of the character. So, you'd have, say, Nasty Nick and Evil Eddie, both featuring the same awesome artwork. It added another layer to the collecting craze, trying to get both versions of your favorites!

While they had their heyday, GPKs definitely faded from the mainstream for a while. But here’s the cool part: they started making a comeback in 2003 and Topps has even re-released some of the original series for special anniversaries. You can now find them in their "Chrome" edition, released in 2023. And for those of you who held onto our childhood treasures, well, you might be sitting on a goldmine! Recent auctions on eBay have shown just how much some of these can be worth. I saw one Nasty Nick sell for an astonishing $8,049! And his other identity, Evil Eddie, a little behind but still going for an eye popping $2,224. Of course, these are definitely rare cases, but it just goes to show you that if you still have your old Garbage Pail Kids tucked away somewhere, you never know – they just might be worth a pretty penny. It makes me wish I hadn't spent my extra money on tapes, candy and gum!

So, what are your Garbage Pail Kids memories? Did your teachers confiscate them? Did your parents think they were a waste of money? Share your stories in the comments below! And if you enjoy these little trips down memory lane, or if you're just looking for more unique content, consider chipping in a little something to keep this blog going. Every bit helps me dedicate more time to these fun dives and, of course, stay tuned for more updates regarding my progress on getting Under the Lifeguard's Watch out into the world for Casper and Soren!


Wednesday, May 21, 2025

Cabbage Patch Craze: More Than Just a Doll, It Was a Full-Blown 80s Throwdown!


Alright, buckle up, Buttercup, because we're about to take a DeLorean ride straight back to the glorious, sometimes slightly insane, decade of my youth!

Okay, fellow children of the glorious 80s, let's talk about something that might just trigger a little flashback shiver of pure, unadulterated childhood longing: Cabbage Patch Kids. For me, personally, the yearning was real. Year after year, that adorable, slightly lumpy-faced doll made its way onto my Santa wishlist. Did it ever materialize under the Christmas tree? Nope. My mama had a very firm stance on the whole "dolls are for girls" thing. Didn't matter how much I pleaded, how many adorable adoption stories I concocted in my head – nada.

But you know what? That unfulfilled desire never really went away. In fact, it morphed into this slightly cheesy, totally GenX dream of one day making a pilgrimage to the actual Babyland General Hospital up in Cleveland, Georgia. Forget the mass-produced versions you see in stores and online today – the ones that, while still kinda cute, lack that certain something. No, I'm talking about the full experience, the "adoption" process, the whole shebang. Maybe it's the lingering rebellion against the "boy toys" and "girl toys" divide of our youth or maybe it's just a deep-seated need to finally hold one of those little guys (or gals!) in my arms. Whatever it is, Babyland Hospital is on the bucket list.

And speaking of the "real" deal versus what ended up on store shelves... remember the lengths some folks went to when they couldn't snag one of those coveted Coleco creations back in the day? The stories were legendary! Parents camping out overnight, the frantic calls to every toy store within a fifty-mile radius, the almost mythical tales of delivery trucks being swarmed. It was like Black Friday, but for dolls with yarn hair and uniquely lopsided faces.

Then there were the brave (or perhaps slightly misguided) souls who tried to DIY their own Cabbage Patch Kid. Oh, the epic fails! I vaguely recall a few girls at school who brought their family member's DIY versions of lumpy bodies, eyes that didn't quite line up and hair that looked more like a bad perm gone wrong. One poor little girl attempted to forge the infamous signature on the doll's hiney in an attempt to fool everyone to no avail, she got bullied more for that than her homemade doll. I wonder if there were even patterns floating around for these homemade attempts? It's a testament to the hold these dolls had on us that people were willing to try their hand at crafting what was essentially a soft sculpture with a whole lot of personality.

But let's not forget the darker side of the Cabbage Patch craze: the actual violence. Yes, you read that right. Grown adults, driven by the desire to fulfill their kids' Christmas wishes (or maybe their own inner child's longing?), were reportedly getting into actual physical altercations in toy store aisles. Shoving, pushing, maybe even a well-placed elbow or two – all for the chance to snag one of those limited-stock dolls. It sounds insane now, but that's how intense it was. These weren't just toys; they were a cultural phenomenon.

The brainchild of artist Xavier Roberts, these weren't just any dolls. They had a whole backstory, a birth in a magical cabbage patch, and the adoption process at BabyLand General Hospital. Originally called "Little People," these hand-stitched creations with their soft bodies and distinctive faces debuted in the late 70s and are now highly sought-after collector's items, some fetching prices that would make our 1980s allowance budgets weep. When Coleco got involved in '82 Cabbage Patch Kids mania truly took off.

It's wild to think that something as simple as a doll could create such a frenzy. But the Cabbage Patch Kids were more than just playthings; they were a symbol of the era. They tapped into something primal – a desire for connection, for something unique, for a little bit of magic in a world that often felt decidedly un-magical.

And that brings us to today. Those original dolls, and even the subsequent waves, hold a special place in the hearts of us GenXers. Whether you were lucky enough to "adopt" one, spent years yearning like yours truly, or just remember the sheer pandemonium surrounding them, the Cabbage Patch Kids are a vivid thread in the tapestry of our childhood.

So, fellow time travelers, what are your Cabbage Patch memories? Did you score one? Did your mom, Aunt or family friend attempt a DIY version? Were you a witness to the toy store wars? Spill the beans in the comments below! We'd love to hear your stories.

And hey, speaking of cherished memories and maybe, just maybe, rekindling some of that childhood magic... if you happen to stumble upon a particularly adorable vintage Cabbage Patch Kid needing a new home (perhaps a donation to adopt one that hasn't made its way from Babyland yet), well, let's just say this old GenX heart wouldn't mind giving it a loving "adoption." Just a thought! ๐Ÿ˜‰


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