I told this story on the Steve & Vikki morning show in Atlanta a few years ago and have been asked a few times to elaborate on it. As I've mentioned, I was a hustler in New York when I was 16. Toward the end of my time of being a big ol' ho and homeless, I found the easiest marks aka "Johns" were the out of townees.
One night I noticed a sad alcohol ridden couple that were partying it up among themselves at the Ninth Circle on a slow night. They ended up gravitation towards me...well the woman (really) started talking to me for her friend, breath reeking of Frangelico. She then asked what I thought of her friend...I said something like "His shoes are small and don't match his outfit" which she apparently thought was the most hilarious thing ever said...next thing I knew, her tongue was in the back of my throat...LADY BACK OFF I ONLY ALLOW DICKS THERE!!! Apparently this warranted her friend to troll over and feel me up...then she asks the question "Are you a hooker?" and I reply "Me? Why would you think that?"
****I was wearing something close to this in December****
Next thing I remember is my friend Sunny Oz yelling across the bar "Have fun with the breeders" as we made way up the stairs and outside into a cab. What the bloody hell have I done? I am in a cab heading to a hotel in the financial district sandwiched between the two oddest people I could ever have met in a gay bar. I have visions of blowing the Iron Sheikh driving the cab to get out of this mess. We end up at a the Marriott Hotel in the financial district and into the elevator we all stand when the doors close. The elevator goes up and stops, she gets off and screams "have fun"...He and I go go up another floor and into his room. He passes out almost instantly, I'm bored and hate Marriott TV channels...look around to see..MINIBAR. It's like a vending machine, you pull, it dispenses and apparently charges the room. I find this out by flipping channels to the room info screen on the TV and see $375 charges to minibar after I'd filled my backpack with random crap like candy, nuts and airplane sized liquor bottles. A few hours later I shower before he gets up. Once he's up, with a hangover from hell and ready for his shower, I tell him I needed to get home before my parents realize I didn't come home. I loved the fact that he didn't know I was "homeless" and could use the "I'm in high school" approach to get out of there quickly. He said he thought I was at least 21 up to this point and offered me "hush" money...Who knew being underage could be so lucrative? I hit the door ASAP without the contents of my bag clinking together and power walked out the hotel and down the street to the train uptown to hang out and blend in to the rest of the city. I often wondered if he disputed the charges and how he explained it all...Good times for sure but definitely not for someone over the age of 18.
A well known fact about myself, I am terrified of heights...Another well known fact about myself, I love carnivals...and another fact about myself, my favorite ride of all time is the Sky Wheel, better known to the general public as the Double Ferris Wheel.My first memory of the ride was back in the late 70s when Century 21 Shows booked the massive Space Wheels owned by Royal American Shows (see photo on the right) to play the Greater Gulf State Fair in Mobile, AL. The Space Wheels is simply 2 Sky Wheel units that share a center support. That was the only time I'd seen and ridden the Space Wheels. After that, the Sky Wheel was a regular staple on the midways of the fairs in Mobile and Pensacola...up until the mid 1990s. Due to the size and the fact that replacement parts have become expensive and difficult to obtain, many shows have opted to retire the ride.Having seen it at every fair I attended when I was a kid, I feel let down when I visit a large fair without one. A few midway operators understand the appeal of the ride among enthusiets and have taken to initiative refurbish some of the older wheels and bring them back out. There are currently 13 or so on the road, 4 have made it to Georgia fairs that I've attended over the past 10 years.What's so great about the ride? You say it's just a ferris wheel? Think again. It's actually a thrill ride disguised as a gentle giant. If you're lucky enough to sit in the "over the top" seat on either end of the wheel, you will experience an elevator drop that will tip your seat so you're facing the sky from the top until you make it to the bottom of the rotation and before you know it, you're back at the top doing it all over again.The ride has actually been manufactured by 3 companies, it began with the Valare Brothers before the rights were acquired by the Allen Herschell company and then Chance Rides after they purchased the assets of Allen Herschell. It stands just short of 80 feet, usually dwarfing the rest of the midway. 8 seats on each wheel, it's capacity is 48 adults per ride cycle. Click on the video link of my 2011 Sky Wheel onride experience to get an idea of what it's really like. If you ever find yourself on a midway with one of these guys...check it out for yourself and you'll understand why it's known as "The King of the Midway."
Picture it, a Dodge Aries ticking (timing chain slightly off) it's way down the street, windows up, heat blasting and smoke having no place to escape, you'd think our car was a mobile steamroom or the set of a music video if you were looking in from outside. Have you ever noticed the older people get, they tend to switch to cheaper brands like Doral, Basic or GPC or if you're really hard up you switch to Bugglers and roll your own and look like a pothead. My dad was a Camel/Pall Mall guy and my mom Winston...until they made the switch to Doral...Dad eventually switched back to Pall Mall. When I smoked in 1992-1997 I was a Dunhill snob but settled for Dutch Treats, True and Winston. In recent years (when I get hard up for a smoke which is not very often) I find Marlboro Smooth 100's and the girly brand Misty satisfy my craving. What is it about Misty's that turn off men? 
They have great flavor. I don't really know where I'm going with this...Anyway, I was shocked to find that the price of a pack of cigarettes has jumped to $4 on average or $3.50 for generics. I've been told that the reason behind the price hikes is because they are unhealthy...So is Crisco and Coke but they stay the same...McD's has a dollar menu...Where the fuck was that dollar menu when I was starving and homeless in NYC in 1992? It was cheaper to get a pack of cigarettes than a double cheeseburger and a Coke back then...Amazing huh?...Nowadays it seems the people that can really afford cigarettes are rich enough to know better. Do I currently smoke? Not really. When I say not really I mean I'm not a smoker but I do occasionally get a craving that I gots to satisfy...just like when I need to pour myself a cup of pickle juice and enjoy.
