Ready for another trip down memory lane to those unforgettable elementary school Christmas concert nights? These evenings were filled with excitement, nerves, and a lot of off-key singing. Picture an hour of kids standing on risers in the cafeteria, dressed in what our teachers told us should be our Sunday best, but often looked like a hot mess. To be completely honest, I didn’t know the lyrics to most of the songs except the ones that I heard on my Elvis record and what was featured in the Christmas specials that would air each year. Otherwise, I was singing my own version, We Wish You A Merry Christmas never included Figgy Pudding in my mind, it was always Piggy Footing or something like that. I’m pretty sure 90% of the kids were either singing out of tune and the other 10% were rolling with it in the style of Ethel Merman screaming at the top of their lungs. I was shy at the time so my words were usually a monotonous mumble at best.
The program was the same every year: all Christmas songs, no Jewish songs. I’m sure there was a Jewish family or two around, but in Pace, Florida, there was only one holiday season—it wasn’t called the holiday season—it was Christmas Season. It was always Merry Christmas, never Happy Holidays or Season’s Greetings.
Our music teacher, Mrs. Chiles, would passionately bang away on the piano while none of us were near a mic, this was basically where we all learned to belt out tunes if we really wanted to be heard. The only microphones were the white Peavey branded mics hanging from the ceiling above us, and I’m sure most of them didn’t even work. Knowing what I know now about sound, floor mics would have been more effective but that was OK, we learned projection. We would belt out classics like "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer," "Frosty the Snowman," "Santa Claus is Coming to Town," "Up on the House Top," and the slightly controversial "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus."
Then, the lights would go down, and you’d hear the unmistakable sound of a box of bells being pushed around the stage. When the lights came back up, the hot mess of a choir was now armed with bells. You know what’s coming next... "Dashing through the snow..." as we hit the chorus of "Jingle Bells." It was like an Annie audition gone wrong, with kids belting out "JINGLE BELLS, JINGLE BELLS, JINGLE ALL THE WAY," competing with the tinnitus-inducing sound of 90 children armed with bells.
"Jingle Bells" has four verses and one chorus that repeats three times. By the second verse, my mind would wander, and I’d draw a blank, picking it back up at the chorus. This continued through the night until we finally reached the end. But wait, why are they still holding the bells? Oh yes, it’s time for "JINGLE BELL, JINGLE BELL, JINGLE BELL-ROCK"—the stripped-down, Lady Gaga-like piano and bell version of "Jingle Bell Rock." By the time we finished "We Wish You a Merry Christmas," very heavy on the "SHHHH" our parents were probably ready to shove their car keys deep into their ears. The second the last "AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR" left our mouths, we were rushed off the stage, with our parents giving us the fake "You were amazing" speeches as we all headed to the car, the sound of our ears ringing drowning out the parents all telling themselves they were glad that's over and it only happens once a year as the roar of the engines fill the parking lot.
Before moving to Florida, I had a similar experience at my old elementary school, Tanner Williams Elementary. Those concerts were arranged by the librarian, whose name I can't recall. Much like at Pea Ridge, we would stand on the risers in the cafeteria, dressed in our best attempt at Sunday best, and belt out the same set of Christmas classics. Whether it was under the direction of Mrs. Chiles or the librarian at Tanner Williams, the spirit and chaos of those elementary school Christmas concerts were the same. These concerts were more than just performances; they were a rite of passage, a chaotic celebration of the season, and an unforgettable part of my childhood memories.
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